The Bay Soccer - Your Area, Your Passion

Tyneside is an amateur team playing in the Second Division of SFSFL (San Francisco Soccer Football League)

By publishing (below) in real time, week after week, the messages of their manager, Nic, and the reactions of the players, we allow you to enter the life of a group of amateur players aiming to win their League and earn promotion to the First Division. (Photo: Antonio Pereira)

These are the remaining matches. We are going to need to win 4 if not all five to get promoted.

I was impressed with how many of you emailed me today rearranging your schedules so you can make the remaining matches.
PLEASE LET ME KNOW IMMEDIATELY IF SOMETHING CHANGES. It would be a shame not to win promotion because of poor prep.

Get your asses to the gym and practice.....this is where the battle is won. We can't be tired down the stretch.

FORZA TYNESIDE BITCHES

The end of the season party and hopefully our promotion party will be on Saturday Sept 6th. This date will NOT change

Let's win on Sunday and secure our destiny.

FORZA TYNESIDE

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 14

Tyneside FC 4-0 SF Fog

***at the request of several of you, I am cc'ing former players on the weekly email. If you wish to be off the list, let me know

Match stats:
Goals:Remy, Liam, Henrique x2
MOM: Eric v Henrique
Quote of the day: belongs to Robb when yelling at Remy (Remy was questioning Robb's decision to leave his line) "Shut the fuck up Remy. Don't you fuckin tell me what to do in my fuckin box. Fuck you." Everyone cheered Robb's emotion and the other team was very confused.

Match synopsis: We win 4-0 v Fog
We played a tad bit lazy at times today but for the most part we dominated-- though left it till late to stamp them out. We began with spurts of good play interrupted by a long ball from them or an errant pass from us. Antonio forgot to kill a chicken this morning and drink its blood so he hit the post early on. Then they had a great chance on goal, off an errant pass, but Robb took on the striker and won the ball. Defensively, Albert's timing was excellent and Eric was all over the place --though it wasn't the plan to have the left full back on the right wing but it paid off. Toward the end of the half and off a corner, Liam headed back across the 6-yard line and Remy headed in. 1-0 at the half. Remy gave Liam a hand job on the way back to the sideline.
The second half opened a bit shaky. Arya almost put one in but the one time he should have toed the ball he chose to go for a chip and the keeper made a brilliant save. We then let them back into it with some counters. Albert, at this point, yelled more than I have ever heard or seen anyone on Tyneside scream (and that's saying a lot), "Come on Tyneside! We were dominating these fuckers. Now, we are on our heels. Let's play our game God damn it!" These rally cries (the other team wept at them) and a goal line save by Eric (once again caused by an errant pass) inspired us. Jason, both inspired and jealous of Remy's intimacy with Liam, lasered a corner to Liam which Liam buried. Jason then gave Liam a hand job. Not five minutes later, Senor made his presence felt (finally --we've missed you sweetie....Dom, are you reading this?) with a phat fab through ball to Henrique which the Nazi Brazilian slotted home easily. A few minutes later, a jet lagged and tired va-hey-hey masta, also found Henrique on another great through ball which of course Henrique coolly finished.

All around, today was another good possession day and performance and we increased our goal differential. What we learned today: that Liam will score or assist as long as you give him a hand job. Remy scored his first goal of the season because Sara was watching --he really has gone straight (except for Liam)....and Thierry wears his hair in an odd manner beyond description (he is Jean Simmons)

PRACTICE
none this week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NEXT MATCH
no match next Sunday.....its the 4th of July weekend.
next match is 7/13/08 at 8:45 v Athletes of Christ...........its vengeance time!!!!!!!!!
OUT: Andy, jason, Los...........ANYONE ELSE???????

get fit. keep fit.........just cause we have a week off does not mean you're fitness gets worse....it should get better.
............FORZA TYNESIDE
ThE MajoR ReDD AsSS.

Match time: 12:15. Be there at 11:15.............LOCATION: Beach Chalet

Roster: Robb, Albert, Remy, Eric, Mark, Joe, Liam, Jones, Jason, Arya, Henrique, Brian, Senor, Sizemore, Thierry, Geoff,

oot: Kurt, Andy, Chris
dead to the world: Dom
has a va-hey-hey: Los

Its another must win as there is a 4 way tie for 2nd and the first place team is only 2pts ahead. Everything is in our own hands.

GET READY, GET FIT, GO MUTHA FUCKAS

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 13

Tyneside FC 2-1 SC Bosna

***at the request of several of you, I am cc'ing former players on the weekly email. If you wish to be off the list, let me know

Match stats:
Goals:Liam, Henrique
MOM: Andy, Sizemore, Eric
Quote of the day: belongs to Arya when answering the question, "What is your most attractive quality to women?". His reply: Penis size.

Match synopsis: We win 2-1 v Bosna
We thoroughly dominated the match from start till finish. The problem was that their keeper made some awe inspiring saves and we missed 3 easy goals. In reality, it should have been 6-0. However, let's consider that Andy was playing goal (did a solid job), we had two new fullbacks (Sizemore, Eric), an 8:45am match, and were playing against a bunch of violent thugs on a short field ---let's take the win!!!!
It was only one nil at the half after Thierry "palmed" the ball to Liam who hit a nice strike from the left corner of the 18 yard box. We then made it 2-0 10 min into the 2nd when Arya gave Henrique a great through ball. We then had 4 chances that went begging....and I mean begging. Some of you were sucking wind pretty badly and need to get your asses in shape (you know who you are). This "fatigue' sort of let them get back into it. Eric and Ben were solid on D but a straggling ball, a deflection, and a deflected shot in succession gave them a goal. We then had another 3 great chances but their keeper was awesome and produced fine save after fine save.....the good news is that most keepers are no where near this good and we should put several away next week.

All around, today was another good possession day and performance. We are the second highest scoring team......we can and will be first!

PRACTICE
Wed at 8pm at Franklin.

NEXT SUNDAY
12:15 v Fog at Beach Chalet
OUT: Chris, Andy, Kurt. ANYONE ELSE??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

get fit. keep fit
ThE MajoR ReDD AsSS.............FORZA TYNESIDE

Sunday Match time: 8:45.....we are in second.....we finish there we get promoted!!!!
LOCATION: Beach Chalet***************Be there at 8am

ROSTER: Geoff, Chris, Albert, Mark, Eric, Andy, Jones, Joe, Jason, Arya, Liam, Senor, Theirry, Sizemore, Antonio (Robb), Henrique (Kurt)

oot: Kurt, Brian, Robb
hurt: Los, Remy
MIA: Dom

****If you have not ordered a hoody,LS t, or t-shirt you will not play

****Spain v Italy is on at 11:45 on Sunday so let's watch it at my place or Kezar!!!!!

Nic

Sorry to miss practice. I spent my time in the ER getting my vocal cord cyst drained. Fun. You'll all be so happy to know that I am now on voice rest for a month. So, fuck all of you for making fun of me for the next month.

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 11

Ostrakizein FC 0-0 Tyneside FC

Sucks that we drew, but we played our best ball to
date (other than the finishing). Good stuff, boys!

Arya

We drew 0-0 despite having 80% possession.

I am too disgusted to write more

Practice at Franklin

Nic

Yesterday was the 5 year anniversary of the team. June 11, 2003 was the practice during which we had an exodus from So City.

oh, and Alan Shearer will be attending practice next week.

Nic

win on sunday, and hte next....

what was the big news at the end of practice?

sorry i didn't stay for the whole practice, but i was just so mad at jones i had to go skeet shooting (better than sitting in the car).

Brian

Win boys

Jason

Game time: 11:15
Be there: 10:15

roster: Robb, Remy, Albert, Mark, Kurt, Liam, Joe, Geoff, Eric, Andy, Arya, Senor, Thierry, Sizemore

hurt (as in feelings): Los
makin a comeback: Rob
oot: Brian, Jason, Chris,
suspended: Antonio, Henrique, Jones

Yo.
attached is the new logo for the hoodys, tshirts, and long sleeve shirts (the lettering will be in gold like last time)

prices are as follows:
hoody: $70
long sleeve t: $25
t-shirt: $20

We have to hit 20 of each to actually make it worth while to order them so if less than 20 people actually want one of these items it will not be ordered.

Please let me know what if anything you would like and the size

love and praise
ThE MajoR ReDD AsSS

ps: if you sent me an email before pls do again as these are final prices.
THE TEAM IS A BIT BROKE RIGHT NOW AND IT WOULD HELP IF EACH OF YOU ORDERED ONE OF EACH ITEM......!!!!!!! Otw, we may have to collect extra $25 from each of you

June 8, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 10

Tyneside FC 2-0 Overlords

We now sit 3rd but within less than 3 points of each of the teams above us: destiny is in our own hands.

Match stats:
Goals:Eric, OG/Andy....
MOM: Mark+Arya
Quote of the day: Jason to me as I yell to motivate us: "Nic, shut the fuck up."

Match synopsis: We win 2-0 v Overlords
We had the overwhelming amount of possession and created several near chances in the first half. Unfortunately we could not convert and it was 0-0 at the half.
We continued to pressure them and to get the ball in the box. Arya caused them all sorts of problems including getting a shot off that then ricocheted for Eric to tap home. 1-0. We lost a little composure then and let them back in. However, after Robb stopped a one on one with them we took it up a notch and continued to pressure. Mark made an excellent cross into the box that Andy pressured causing a half own goal and half goal for Andy. Then one of their players decided to try to hit Kurt for no apparent reason. Jones ran on the field to protect his lover and was red carded for doing so. UGH

We looked pretty good today though they helped. I think we need to be more fit though. I am gonna make you run your asses off on Wed.

PRACTICE
Wed at 8pm at Franklin.

NEXT SUNDAY
11:15 v Ostrakizen
out: Jason, Brian,......and maybe Henrique, Antonio, & Jones..........ANYONE ELSE????

get fit. keep fit
ThE MajoR ReDD AsSS.............FORZA TYNESIDE BITCHES

Henrique and Antonio have received 3 match suspensions.
We're down to 14 people for the match.

Senor, Dom?

Roster: Robb, Chris, Albert, Brian, Mark, Kurt, Jone, Joe, Eric, Jason, Arya, Sizemore, Thierry, Andy, and .....hopefully..... Antonio &Henrique =16

Practice at 8pm Franklin.
Who ever has the balls and pinnies....bring them....all.

We'd better have a mega turn out tonight or Tyneside FC will have some new faces next week

June 1st, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 10

Tyneside FC 2-3 City

*We have half the season left. The first half has been a roller coaster. But the second half will be smoother...starting NOW.

Match stats:
Goals: Henrique, Albert
MOM: ?
Quote of the day: ?

Match synopsis: We lost 3-2 v City
Thanks to the Va-hey-hey Masta for running the show. Obviously, I was not there but I have spoken to a few of you. It appears as though we were flat in the first half (attendance at practice better improve). They scored first on a near post shot (we've had too many of those this season). However, we rallied back and Albert put home a header. Then we went up on a Henrique special but were reportedly unlucky to let them draw level on what sounded like an own goal. Again, we put up a fight and hit the bar but then they got a questionable penalty and won 3-2.

After the match there was some 'reported' discord between some of our players and the ref and disappointingly amongst ourselves. I don't care as much about winning as I do about having all of you as friends and brothers who stand TOGETHER and enjoy footie and life TOGETHER. While I can understand being pissed at the ref, being pissy with one another is just plain stupid...no matter the reason. Everyone had better get your head out of your ass and back on your shoulders and then kiss and make up by Wed. WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER. We are going to rally and we are going to win....not because of better skills but because WE STAND TOGETHER through good and bad. Its cliche but all for one and one for all or get your ass on that other team with Luca de la Hayward!

PRACTICE
Wed at 8pm at Franklin. I am fit again and will run the show so show the fuck up.

love and kisses
TMRA

Bhoys,
Obviously we just had a break and people need to get back in the swing of futbol life. However, attendance at practice needs to improve or those of you who have been absent will be replaced.

I can run again so I will be at every practice and match for the rest of the season. Of course, this means you better be at every practice as well except when you've given me advance notice that you will be away.

Get ready to run - a lot- with me......:)

bring it and for fuck's sake win on Sunday...or Los will cry like a little girl with pigtails who just lost her lollipop to a homeless man

ThE MajoR ReDD AsSS

Sunday Match time is at 10:30 at the Polo Fields.

Be there at 9:30

ROSTER: Robb, Chris, Remy, Albert, Kurt, Brian, Andy, Jones, Joe, Henrique, Jason, Arya, Eric, Antonio, Geoff, Mark, Thierry

**The Va-Hey-Hey Masta will be calling the match in my absence (I am in Chicago).
Arya has the player cards, gear, and roster sheets. Henrique has one set of kits.

WIN. Its killin me that I cannot be there.

Poor showing last night. In attendance:

Robb, Old School, Albert, Me, Jones, Zamkoff, Brian,
Thierry, Mark, Chris, Sizemore, Espander.

The rest of you: fuck off!

Arya

yo
many of you have asked about the 2nd half schedule.

There has been no official word and there likely will not be until the first weekend in June. However, if this season is like previous ones then the schedule will repeat the exact times and order of the first half of the season starting June 8th.....but I do not know if they will skip the weekend of July 6 or not

keep tuned to the website: sfsfl.com

N

We have practice this week on Wed the 21st from 8:00pm to 10:00pm at FRANKLIN SQUARE
This week counts toward attendance for the next match-day roster

Hallo Bhoys!

It's been 2 years since we updated the Tyneside crest and made hoodies, t-shirts, and long sleeve t's
Jones and I plan on making some simple changes to the most current crest (the overall shape will be that of the Barcelona crest but with the same colors and make-up as we currently have: black and white stripes, a ball with a skull superimposed on it, and Tyneside FC est. 2003)

estimated prices are as follows:
hoody: $70
long sleeve t: $30
t-shirt: $20

We have to hit 20 of each to actually make it worth while to order them so if less than 20 people actually want one of these items it will not be ordered.

Please let me know what if anything you would like and the size! You have until May 21st to order

love, hugs, & kisses

TMRA (The Major ReD AsS) - Nic

May 6th, 2008

Hello,
sorry to trouble you but Tyneside FC won its match this past Sunday versus Barbary 4-2.
The website erroneously has it listed at 4-3.

Having lost out on promotion 3 years ago by goal difference we would appreciate the correction.

thanks
Nicholas
Manager of Tyneside

May 4th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 9

Barbary FC 2 - 4 Tyneside FC

Match stats:
Goals: Henrique x3, Jones
MOM: Henrique (obvious as to why)
Quote of the day: (at Finnys---for those not there, you missed something special): Jones+Nic (about Rana...while Rana is talking to them): Jones to Rana: "Look at you. You have skin like butter." Nic: "She tastes like butter..." Rana to Nic: "How would you know:?" Arya: "I know."

Match synopsis: We win 4-2 v Barbary
The match started a little flat. Despite having the wind at our backs we let them have possession and we forced Robb into a point blank save. We also forced Chris into another goal line clearance but regrouped and had some shots of our own. Then a long distance clear on their part fell through Robb's hands and was tapped in. 1-0 to them. Fear not, we found composure and stamina and Brian from right full back mailed a through pass to Henrique at the right edge of the 18-yard box which he coolly slotted home with his left foot. 1-1 at the half.

We were the stronger side in the second half though Robb redeemed himself with 3 great saves which kept us in the hunt. Arya's hustle once again paid dividends when his pressure made them cough up the ball to Jones at the top of the 18 which he slammed bammed home to mama. 2-1. We held but they picked up the tempo and put us under pressure. A couple of yellow cards later (for both teams) they put in a 25yd shot that deflected off Brian and into the net 2-2. They continued to be frustrated with our possession and we went to 3-4-3 to try to win the game with 15min left. We won a throw in deep in their end, which truthfully should have been theirs, but God paid us back for the game against his little athletes: Liam took the throw and one of their players, frustrated by the call, caught the ball with both hands in their box. This incredibly stupid player, whose name ironically is Luca, was sent off with a red card and gifted us a PK which Henrique, swagger intact and penis hangin large, buried. 3-2. A few moments later, demoralized by being down to 10 men, they gave up possession to Remy who found Henrique on a long through ball who juked his way around a defender and the keeper to put us up 4-2. The game ended with 2 glorious chances for the cursed Antonio. He had a tap in in the 6-yd box which he put over the cross bar and then had a one on one with the keeper that the keeper saved.....we all laid hands on him after the game and we will pray for him in the weeks to come.

What did we learn today: Never give up. & for those at Finny's: Apparently, everyone belongs to FACEBOOK but Nic. If a woman does not sleep with you within the first 2months after dating then she is gettin some from Arya. Don't let Rana have 3 Greyhounds, a shot of whiskey, a beer, and her first bong hit ever and then eat noodles that Arya picked up: it only leads to vomit in her hair and on the floor with Elza trying to lick it all up.

Wed 5/7: no practice
Sun 5/11: no match
Wed 5/14: no practice
Sun 5/18: no match

Wed 5/21 practice
Sun 5/25: no match
Wed 5/28 practice
Sun 6/1: match at 10:30am

guys,
did anybody pick up an oldschool tyneside hoodie, size large and probably a little smelly, after the game today? i lost mine. let me know. thanks..........ben

Match time: 3:45pm. Be there at 2:45pm

Roster: Robb, Albert, Remy, Kurt, Chris, Jones, Joe, Eric, Brian, Arya, Antonio, Geoff, Sizemore, Andy, Mark, Liam, Henrique. This means 6 subs. Not all of the subs may be used.

April 29th, 2008

Los,
1) there are no fields that week other than youngblood and we could use the break from getting our cars trashed.
2) this gives everyone 2 weeks off from this Sunday's match to rest and recover.....your ass included.
3) with two recent cuts we're down $700 and the team is broke. We need to save money.
4) I assume attendance at practice during these weeks when there are no matches would be dismal.

Lastly, Antonio can use the time to go on his honeymoon....he is not sure if it will be with Tina or a blow up doll. Eric can get into better shape. Jones can have that last bit of surgery needed to correct his you know what. Arya can rest his groin and take penicllin. Remy can get his nails done...it takes 2 weeks. Sizemore can wash all the skid marks off his clothes. Liam can see dermatology. Joe can eat. Zamkoff can see his shrink. Chris can cry over Liverpool's demise in the CL. Andy can ask himself if he really wants to hang with a bunch of psycho homos. Thierry can work on his website and get pictures of us all. Kurt can work on his agoraphobia. Albert can get that operation to become Hispanic. Geoff can visit a cancer farm....you go there and they lock you in a room till you no longer want to smoke cancer sticks. Brian can get a hair cut. Robb can detox. Henrique can find Jesus (he is under your bed).

Dom and Senor will do nothing but drink more beer and smoke more weed. However, it will be fun to get their texts week after week when they show to Youngblood and wonder where everyone is :)

And on a personal note.....I just need time to work on my tan.

See you manana.....except you Los, your ass is in worse shape than mine. If I beat you back then you are the softest of the soft

ta ta for now
TMRA (The Major --ReD AsS)

Nic

Is it a good idea to skip practice for an investment
meeting??????
Carlos

I will most likely be here...

May Schedule

Please see the schedule for May. We have 2 weeks off from matches and practice.

PLEASE RSVP IF YOU ARE HERE ON SUNDAY 5/25 FOR A FRIENDLY

Each of the practices in May will hopefully be friendly matches.

Sun 5/4: match at 3:45pm

Wed 5/7: no practice
Sun 5/11: no match
Wed 5/14: no practice....this is when Tyneside Investment group will meet instead
Sun 5/18: no match

Wed 5/21 practice
Sun 5/25: no match ...who is here on Sunday at 11am for a friendly?
Wed 5/28 practice
Sun 6/1: match at 10:30am

April 27th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 8

Tyneside FC 5 - 1 Tornado

Match stats:
Goals: Geoff, Jason, Arya, Henrique, Antonio
MOM: Remy (for not dying) + Arya for his pressure up top....on them not on himself.
Quote of the day: Kurt (about himself) "I am socially awkward.

Match synopsis: We win 5-1 v Tornado
We played well today. Pre-match warm-ups started with Remy fainting but regaining fitness after mouth to mouth from Brian and an invigorating trip to the toilet with Jones. We managed most of the possession in the first half though they hit the post about 20min in and skyed another shot over the bar from just inside the 18. We then got down to business. Andy brought the ball down the right wing, and when even with the 6-yard box, passed back to Geoff at the 18 who shot it in....it sort of hit off/was redirected by Henrique but he was offsides and so the goal goes to Geoff....sort of. 1-0 at half...should have been 2-0 but Antonio still thinks the point of the match is to hit the bar with the ball.
The second half opened brightly. Arya ran his ass off and got Jason the the ball who slotted in from near the penalty spot. 2-0. We kept getting the ball deep into their box and Geoff should have had a second but it was erroneously called offsides. Then Robb had a moment with Chris....Robb picked the ball up and rolled it to Chris inside our 18 and well...they got it and scored. No worries though as Jason lobbed into the box moments later and Arya buried the slowest header in the history of man 3-1. Robb then more than redeemed himself with not one but 2 great saves. Then a bit of beauty down our right side: Kurt started a give and go with Andy and then Kurt masterly crossed in for Henrique to head home. Then Sizemore worked his magic down the right and found Antonio who was deep in their 18 yard box. Antonio then dribbled along the endline and in Ronaldo like fashion scored the last goal 5-1

What did we learn today: Joe can't ride a bike, Sizemore "sharts" his pants regularly, and that when we score we win.

Goal Scorers:
Henrique: 3
Antonio: 3
Jason: 3
Arya: 2.5
Chris: 2
Liam: 2
Jones: 2
Geoff: 1
Eric: 1/2
Joe: 1/2

Assists:
Jason:3
Arya:2
Chris:2
Antonio:2
Andy:2
Liam:1
Eric:1
Joe:1
Kurt: 1
Sizemore: 1

Wed training
Wed at YOUNGBLOOD 8:00pm-10pm.

SUNDAY
May 4 at 3:45
out: Jason...anyone else?

April 24th, 2008

Match 8 - Announcement

Message by Nic

thanks. we will proceed.

Message by Mark

I'll give it up if necessary. I know it doesnt really make sense swapping a defender for a forward, but if nothing else comes up, I'll let him in.

Message by Henrique

I knew it!!!

Washing the kits was gonna pay out!!!

To all of you, next time Nick asks for someone to wash the kits, make sure to raise that hand...
And Antonio, did you see that Brazilian National Team play last night? Does it not make you proud to be from that same city?

Roster (CORRECTION): Robb, Chris, Brian, Kurt, Mark, Liam, Remy, Jones, Eric, Arya, Andy. Antonio, Joe, Senor, Sizemore, Geoff, Jason...

BUT ONE PROBLEM: I forgot to include Henrique, who while not at practice, deserves the right to play as he missed 4 weeks during his holiday and he washed the kits last week.....is anyone willing to give up his spot or do I have to make one of you hate me?

Match time: 12:15pm. Be there at 11:15.

Roster: Robb, Chris, Brian, Kurt, Mark, Liam, Remy, Jones, Eric, Arya, Andy. Antonio, Joe, Senor, Sizemore, Geoff

April 22nd, 2008

Please show up. We will be taking attendance, and,
obviously, we need a lot of work. See you at Young
Blood at 8.

A

Message by Nic:

We have training at 8pm - 10pm at Youngblood....Wednesday for those few of you who are insane.

Arya, aka Lamar, Lamario, Persian Chickenhawk, The Elder, and NakedChubby_Asian_Chicks.com's biggest fan will be running the show

smile. Jesus loves you and so does Sizemore.

sincerely
The Major (Red Ass)

ps: if we lose this Sunday we are changing the team to a male modeling firm. I have already lined up some potential contracts:
Jones: Calvin Klein metrosexual underwear line
Arya: anything orange
Eric: The Gap
Sizemore: leather for him and her
Robb: wife beater t-shirts for hanes
Los: Louis Vutton Handbags
Remy: gillette razors for her
Liam: Pert shampoo
Kurt: modern fashion for muslims
Joe: huggies for the older child
Geoff: Marlboro adds
Antonio: lingerie for the man who is okay with male lingerie
Albert: sequin wear for the modern male

April 20th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 7

South City FC 1 - 0 Tyneside FC

MOM:
Quote of the day: Sizemore "Why do we suck? Fuck."

Match synopsis: We lose 1-0 v So City
We dominated possession. They scored in the final minute of the game on a shite goal. We couldn't score even if we were filthy rich and surrounded by the most desperate crack whores to ever troll the planet. The question remains as to why.

IMPORTANTLY, despite losing most of the team sojourned to Finny's and had a great time together....and that's what Sundays are really about (...the goals will come....we just need a little luck.....Jesus is coming back into the picture)

Goal Scorers:
no changes from last week

Assists:
no changes from last week

REMEMBER, we're not about winning or losing. While it would be nice to win, Wed+Sunday's are about friends and fun. Don't lose site of that. In fact, try to make it the primary reason you show up and just maybe the goals will overflow...and if they don't then at least you have something more valuable than a win...one another as butt buddies

April 18th, 2008

I am very close to being back in shape again, so perhaps I will come by practice next week or the following week. Forza Tyneside!

April 17th, 2008

Match 7 - Announcement

Message by Nic:

he is not back .....yet

Message by Brian:

CHRISTIAN!
if the great dane is truly back and fit then i will sit.

enough drama -nails skulls! sunday 2pm

Message by Nic:

Here's the answer to why Tony is not on the roster and is now off the team:

1) 2 weeks ago he asked only to be included on the roster when he could start and play at least 60min. Thus, he was left off the roster 2 weeks ago
2) After further discussion, we tried him in the middle last week but that was no where near successful
3) He was scared of us on Sunday after the match....I don't think he has ever met Marj Jane or heard so many euphemisms for penis, vagina, anal sex, and homosexual. He also did not appreciate having to use the toliet while Arya watched
4) He shushed Jason during practice last night...and consequently Jason tried to kill him
5) He refused Jason trying to make amends
6) He quit this morning via email

No more drama....except that Christian is back and wants to play. One of you has to go :( Volunteers?

Message by Jason:

I already apologized to Tony individually, but I wanted to apologize to the team as well for my behavior last night. Not
leadership behavior. I've been very frustrated with my individual play lately (which has sucked) and have taken it out on
others. I'll try to get better, JZ

Message by Nic:

Destiny is still in our own hands. We win and we move up to our rightful place in the table. We rise above and play to our talents and we will win.

Talk. Small pass. Move. Talk. Shoot. Score. Never stop defending.....all together.

Sunday match time: 2pm. Be there at 1pm

Roster: Robb, Brian, Chris, Arya, Mark, Dom, Remy, jones, Eric, Jason, Henrique, BenS, BenV, Antonio, Joe, Andy, Geoff.

Sorry, I had to leave people off this week. Either you were not at practice or your fitness is not what it should be (FYI: Sizemore, Dom, and Senor were excused last night from practice to play indoor)

April 15th, 2008

I want to apologize for missing the game on Sunday. I also wanted to let everyone know that it was not because I was out the night before, I actually stayed home. Unfortunately, Megan did not and turned our alarm off when she got home..... for the record she thought she was turning it on. That being said I woke up late and about 9:15 or so and did what I could to get there. Just wanted to say I was sorry ..and beers are on me this week.

Message by Nic:

The importance of this week's practice to the ongoing development and health of the team should not be underestimated by any of you.

I am determined to prevent the losing streak that ruined last season. Changes will be made.

Those of you who think your play was negatively impacted because someone else failed to live up to expectation need to correct your thinking. We win and lose as a team and not because this or that person had a bad game, had a moment of lack of focus, or was not there.
There are no excuses for the lack of unity and chemistry that brought on the last 2 losses. If we are collectively determined to do what we do during practice --short pass, possess, talk, be smart, and score -- then we will have fun and enjoy ourselves win or lose because the only way we lose when we do what we are capable of is that the opponent must be better than us. The opponents during the past 2 weeks were not better. We beat ourselves.

It is time to rise above and exceed what you are capable of....together.

Get your ass to the gym. Get angry. Get focused. Rise above....

April 13th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 6

Tyneside FC 0 - 1 Real Sao Paulo FC

MOM:
Quote of the day: Sizemore: "Get the fuck up and stop pretending like you're hurt."

Match synopsis: We lose 1-0 v Sao Paolo
Simply put, we are better than this. The match was more than frustrating to watch today. We had gobs of possession but no one could score because no one was determined to make it happen. Some of you gave good effort. Some of you looked like you just woke up. Some of you slept through the match, even though you were there. We lacked focus and finesse in the offensive third and could not finish. Then a moment of lack of focus in the back (who was supposed to mark that guy??) gave them an open header and an undeserved goal on one of two shots on target for the entire game.

We will not continue in this zone of being scared to give our all and devoid of mental readiness. Your confidence cannot and will not plummet. Its time to play hard, be smart, talk, and have some fun. There are players on this team who may not have the skill of the starters of the past 2 weeks but will bleed the field red with effort and thus will get starting spots from now on.

Its like we sat down to take a test we know the answers to but then went blank on. Why? Can some one explain?

Goal Scorers:
no changes from last week

Assists:
no changes from last week

Wed training
Wed at FRANKLIN 8:30pm-10pm. note time and location change. THERE WILL BE LOTS OF PRACTICE AT FINISHING AND TALKING

SUNDAY
2pm game. Anyone out?

April 6th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 5

Athletes of Christ 2 - 1 Tyneside FC

Match stats:
Goals: Jones
MOM: Jones
Quote of the day: Robb (about the ref) "You're just bad."
Match synopsis: We lose 2-1 v AofC
WE started off flat again....at least compared to them and they had most of the possession for the first half. I tried to tweak things but perhaps I only made things more confusing. Its hard to prepare for a team WE have never played before. Nonetheless, WE just did not have much gusto until there were 10min left in the 2nd half when WE decided to take control of the match and could have gone ahead if not for some finishing that needed a bit of finesse (WE will be working on finishing)
Perhaps that is what WE lacked today: finesse. This includes me as a manager. The first 30min of the second half were ugly both ways but Jones managed to cut a run through the middle and score but honestly WE cannot depend on Jones to run as much as he does...its just not smart. Despite scoring, WE continued to gift them a giant hole in the middle that WE could not plug and WE just did not play smart....WE were late on tackles, WE gave up on balls, WE watched, WE lacked hustle. WE did not talk...except for a few and you know who you are. So, two minutes after WE scored they nearly replied with only the cross bar keeping us ahead. Then the ref fucked with the game. He missed a clear off sides and it was 1-1. Then WE all witnessed the worst call ever made in SFSFL when Arya was called just outside our 18-y box for dangerous play. There is nothing dangerous about Arya, standing fully upright to head the ball while the opponent has his foot an inch from Arya's head while he attempts to kick the ball but misses. The ref said that Arya should keep his head away from the the opposing player's foot....despite the foot being 5 feet and some inches in the air. Needless to say they converted the resulting free kick into a goal. The good news is that WE then picked ourselves up and nearly tied it 3-4 times. If WE had played like this the whole match the ref would not have mattered....and WE would all feel better right now.

I'll will take the blame for the loss. I could have and should have been better about the subs and the system we went with from start to finish. However, too many of you challenged me today or simply did not do what I asked when I put you in. We were not on the same page and I guess its because I have not been to practice and such. So here is my promise: From now on, I will be at practice from start to finish and I will make sure we are all on the same page. However, many of you said that this week and last that we lacked focus and intensity. I agree, we --as a team--lacked a lust to not only win but to win and earn the win. This lack of desire is unacceptable! You all know that I am an intense person and in my subbing today I was looking to create that intensity on the field. However, I got it wrong because I cannot light a fire under your ass by making subs just as I cannot make you fit...-that's your job. I cannot make you concentrate, focus, and possess the desire to break your body for every last ball. From now on though, I will keep the subs organized but I expect an increase in intensity, concentration, focus, and I want to see, hear, taste, smell, and feel a lust to win from all of you. I will do my part in calling a better game but each of you has to come to matches and to practice with the desire to beat the fuck out of whomever we are playing or die trying. We all had passion for the last 10min today after they went ahead. I want that same passion, if not more, for all 90min for the remaining matches.

Goal Scorers:
Jones: 2
Henrique: 2
Chris: 2
Liam: 2
Antonio:2
Jason:2
Arya: 1.5
Eric: 1/2
Joe: 1/2
Assists:
Chris:2
Jason:2
Antonio:2
Andy:1
Liam:1
Eric:1
Joe:1
Arya:1

Wed training
Wed at FRANKLIN 8:15pm-10pm. note time and location change

SUNDAY
13 April 8:45am v Sao Paolo
out: Henrique...anyone else?

March 31st, 2008

March 30th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 4

SF Fog 1 - 2 Tyneside FC

Match stats:
Goals: Arya/OG, Jason
MOM: the entire team for not giving up the fight
Quote of the day: Jason: "Good teams find a way to win even when they are as bad as we were today."
Match synopsis: We win 2-1 v Fog
We started off flat. We were overconfident from the start thinking that a team that had not won yet would not cause us any difficulties. The wind also played havoc but we were not focused. The first 30min or so were ugly. We were caught ball watching and were out muscled time and again in the center. Our defense did not cave in to the pressure but a shot deflected off Mark and into the goal to give them the lead. We managed to pick our heads up and finished the half with several strikes that went just wide. Dom brought us some creativity and Jones kept our energy up.
We enjoyed the bulk of possession in the 2nd half but had difficultly finding the target. The wind was finally on our side and we spent more energy winning the ball rather than watching it but had only a few shots. Arya, as the right full back, hustled to win a ball on our left wing on their end. He then tried to cross/shoot the ball which took a deflection off one of them and into the net. 1-1. Chance favors those who try and try again.
We continued in possession and Antonio's free and corner kicks bothered them greatly. In fact, Antonio fought off Jason for a free kick that Antonio crossed to Jason who headed home. 2-1. We win. Jason promptly told Antonio that he would blow him later (poor Liam).

Goal Scorers:
Henrique: 2
Chris: 2
Liam: 2
Antonio:2
Jason:2
Arya: 1.5
Jones: 1
Eric: 1/2
Joe: 1/2
Assists:
Chris:2
Jason:2
Antonio:2
Andy:1
Liam:1
Eric:1
Joe:1
Arya:1

Wed training
Wed at Youngblood Coleman 8pm. Park you car safely.

SUNDAY
6 April 10:30: The match for first place v the Athletes of Christ.
Say your prayers this week
out: Henrique, BenS. Anyone else???

FORZA TYNESIDE

March 16th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 3

SC Bosna 1 - 4 Tyneside FC

Match stats:
Goals: Liam, Antonio, Jason, Jones
MOM: Albert
Quote of the day: Bosna coach speaking to me on the sideline about Kurt, "Please tell your player that he is too rough. He needs to sit. He needs to be out of the game. He needs to be punished. Please, coach punisher your player."
Match synopsis:
We won 4-1...again and once again the result was never in doubt. We dominated possession throughout the match and Albert cleaned up in the back. Liam opened the scoring about 15min into the match after Jason sent in a free kick from about 25yds and Liam headed home. We then had the ball in the box pinging and ponging until Antonio slotted in the second. They had little to no opportunities in the first half and basically whined and complained about us being too rough??? Albert ran from end to end winning every header.
The second half opened with another free kick around 25yds out that Jason attempted to cross in but it took a semi-silly skip on the ground and went into the goal untouched. We continued to dominate possession and Jones powered one home from just inside the 18. Then in the final moment of the match the ball skipped around our defense on a funny bounce off the mine field we call a pitch and came to rest at the opponent's feet. As such, Los made an 18 yd run out to the corner of the box and assassinated the player. Of course, you're not supposed to kill people on the pitch so the game ended on a pk which they converted. Cest la vi.
Overall, we played very well and remained focused throughout. Great job all around. 12 goals for in 3 matches and only 2 against.
Goal Scorers:
Henrique: 2
Chris: 2
Liam: 2
Antonio:2
Arya: 1
Jones: 1
Jason:1
Eric: 1/2
Joe: 1/2
Assists:
Chris:2
Jason:2
Antonio:1
Andy:1
Liam:1
Eric:1
Joe:1

Wed FRIENDLY.....PLS LET ME KNOW IF YOU WILL NOT BE THERE
Wed at Youngblood Coleman. Pls be there and ready to go right at 8pm. Park you car safely.
http://maps.google.com/maps?ie=UTF8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-a&q=youngblood+coleman&near=San+Francisco,+CA&fb=1&view=text&hl=en&latlng=37738008,-122384689,2745137992461867438&ei=VV_LR_rnB4aijgHYv-3SDg&cd=1

SUNDAY 23 March:
NO MATCH: Celebrate the resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ in whatever fashion you find desirable. I will be sleeping in.

FORZA TYNESIDE

March 9th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 2

Tyneside FC 4 - 0 Ostrakizein FC

Match stats:
Goals: Chris, Liam, Henrique, Antonio
MOM: Liam and Chris
Quote of the day: Carlos..."If Tom Barney were any other race than white, he would be homeless or in prison."
Match synopsis:
We won 4-1. Luca and Tom, "Whitey", Barney led Ostrichkitchen out on the field but alas I do not think we will get an email from Luca this week. Chris opened the scoring on a wicked header from Antonio's pinpoint corner. We sat back a bit after this and got into a long ball contest for a while but when we returned to simple pass and move we dominated. Andy dribbled the ball along the right side of the 18 yard box and crossed which Liam buried home. We continued the pass and move (keep it simple strategy) and Henrique fought one in after the ball bounced around the box for a bit.
Sadly, we played much of the 2nd half like we were content rather than like we wanted more goals. That is, we sat back a bit and made it more complicated by trying to be fancy and dribble too much. Because of this they were able to counter and win a goal back. However, we refocused....hit Luca and Tom to the ground...a couple of times...can't say these knocks were not fun to watch....and then our pressure led to Liam's shot that the keeper deflected and which Antonio slotted home. 4-1.
Overall, we played very well......but we should have finished them off sooner than we did. We need to keep our focus for all 90 and keep it simple. Bigger challenges loom large and shut outs are always desirable.
Goal Scorers:
Henrique: 2
Chris: 2
Liam: 1
Arya: 1
Antonio:1
Eric: 1/2
Joe: 1/2
Assists:
Chris:2
Antonio:1
Andy:1
Liam:1
Eric:1
Joe:1

March 2nd, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 1

Overlords 0 - 4 Tyneside FC

Match stats:
Goals: Chris, Eric/Joe (1/2 each), Henrique, Arya
MOM (man of the match): Chris....though everyone deserves an honorable mention!!!!!!
Match synopsis:
IWill have a great night's sleep for the first time in 8 weeks since I ruptured my Achilles. It was not that I was worried about my not being able to play....after all my old bones offer the team little. However, in being away from the team I was not sure we would be ready but we were more than chomping at the bit and the credit has to go to Frenchy. Let's have a round of applause for Remy!
We dominated today and won 4-0. I do not think the result was ever in doubt and it's a great omen to open the season with a win over a team that we drew twice last year. Today, unlike last year, we not only held possession from the start but created our luck and deserved the fruits of our labours. Our defense was cohesive and a concrete wall led by the mighty Albert. The midfield was creative and our forwards hustled their asses off. The first 20 min saw us have corner after corner and then after his wicked free kick was saved from 30yds out, Chris put in one from about 20yds with a little skip from the mine field that we call a pitch...it went through their keeper's legs. Then Eric from the left wing made the keeper work hard to make a save that rebounded to Joe who put it in the 6 yard box and it took a deflection for an OG. In the second half, we looked even better with our amount of possession, talking, and pass and move strategy. Henrique tallied about 20 minutes in with his usual flare and then Arya finished another in a style reminiscent of Trezeguet....in the right place at the right time but that in and of itself takes skill and no one could doubt his work rate today. In fact, everyone's work rate was high.....and it will be something we need next week against a faster and more fit team. Also, I should mention that it is not a Tyneside match without a red card...Mark starts off his Tyneside career with an undeserved card for defending himself when a guy took a swing at him (he was ejected too).
We will need to continue the effort and fight next week as it is a contest between the teams most likely to do well....not to mention that Luca will be playing. Now, I actually no longer feel ill will toward Luca but it would be nice to win and prevent a derisive email from him. Don't you think?

http://maps.google.com/maps?ie=UTF8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-a&q=youngblood+coleman&near=San+Francisco,+CA&fb=1&view=text&hl=en&latlng=37738008,-122384689,2745137992461867438&ei=VV_LR_rnB4aijgHYv-3SDg&cd=1

SUNDAY 9 March:
Match at 3:45pm at the Polo Fields
out: Jason, Robb, Mark, Senor. Anyone else?

SPECIAL THANKS.
Thank you to Chris and all those involved from last season in the very special gift of a signed Newcastle United Jersey. It means more than you know! Also, it will give me great pleasure to inform people of the meaning of Va Hey Hey Masta and Del Horno amongst others! If you have not signed it make sure you come over and add your signature.....you're all invited to my place for Easter on the 23rd....

FORZA TYNESIDE
If we can fight together, we must strive together
If we can play together, we must pray together
If we can plan together, we must stand together
If we can cry together, we must try together
We must strive together, if we can fight together
We must pray together, if we can play together
We must stand together, if we can plan together
We must try together, if we can cry together
The future of the team is built on a plan
Of working together whenever we can
So "if" must stand so tall
And "must" alone, cannot fall
For together, forever we bring
The best, the good of it all

February 18th, 2008

End of Pre-Season

Yesterday: ended 2-2 against a team 2 div above us with goals from Old-school Rob and Liam. We looked pretty good! In fact, both goals demonstrated that we can and will do what we did not do against Overlords (our first opponent on 3/2) last year: get in the box and score. The first goal came in from a Chris's brilliant outswinger cross from the left side, that since it was an outswinger (instead of straight or heading out) gave Rob the opportunity as the right wing to run onto it and head it home. The second was a bit of magic from Geoff who took the ball to the touchline int he box, faked the defender, and passed it toward the 6 yard line where Liam as the left wing ran onto it and one timed it home. We had lots of possession yesterday based on the fact that no one took more than 3-4 touches and everyone moved and more impressively, everyone was TALKING.

Wednesday: training at 8pm at Franklin, rain or shine. Pls let me know if you will not be there

Sunday: friendly via Club Marin at 9am at West Sunset (39th and Quintarra). OUT: Eric. Anyone else?

2 weeks to go: get your fitness ready and keep an eye on the website for the schedule: sfsfl.com.
Lessons to learn from the matches v overlords:
1) Pass, move, possess AND adapt. We must adapt to what will be good defense and try several ways to get the ball into the goal
2) talk, talk, talk, talk, talk.
3) Have fun no matter what. Those guys have half the fitness and skill we do but they have fun with one another just because. We should have the same attitude. Enjoy one another....but not in the way some of you are thinking. We're past that now.

February 4th, 2008

Practice:
8pm on Wed at Franklin Sq (17th and Bryant).
I will be there to talk strategy so please make every effort to be present.
In short though, the goal for this season is to have fun and to try our best. If we do this, the results do not matter as we will be happy, have fun, and sing songs

Friendly:
Sunday 11am v Melchester
out: jason, robb.....the rest of you have till Wed to rsvp with a no or you are expected to attend.

January 21st, 2008

Pls welcome Andy to the team. He is the second addition along with Mark.

we have only 2 new guys (liam and erich) coming to training. let me know you what you think and if they are both good then we are done with the search.

WED 23rd: training at 8pm at Franklin Sq. (17th and Bryant)

SUN 27th: friendly v Rovers at 11am. You have until Tuesday to rsvp with a "no"

Today's recap: I think the final score was 6-2. We won. We have to talk more though.

Schedule:
Wed. training sessions at Franklin Sq through February.
SUNDAYS:
2/3 Club Marin
2/10 Melchester
2/17 Cobras
2/24 Vikings

January 14th, 2008

Wed Training:
Wed 8pm at Jackson Park in Portrero Hill (17th and Arkansas). I will be there standing on one leg so you'd better be there too with check in hand if you owe money.

Sunday Friendly:
1pm at Youngblood v IFC. You have until tomorrow to rsvp with a NO, otw you better be there

OPEN SPOTS:
we have 3 open spots. I hope to sort these out in the next 10days at most. Things to consider:

- Wednesday practice/ Sunday friendly matches begin the first week in January
- the league begins the first Sunday in March and goes for 22 weeks (22 total matches) on Sundays

December 30th, 2007

1) Training is this Wed at 8pm at Jackson Park (17th and Arkansas).
You're attendance is required at 80% minimum from this point forward. Additionally, you must give me notice beforehand if you are unable to make it (an email during or after practice does not count)

2) Friendly on Sunday 1/6 at 1pm (out: dom, BenS, thierry....the rest of you better be there).

There is a Sunday friendly every SUnday from now on

Here is to a successful and fun season!

December 16th, 2007

Today's Friendly:
We won 3-1. Henrique had a hat trick. We played with Remy in goal and me up top and only 11 players.
We had 7 no shows !!!!!. Some you let me know why. Most of you did not which is unacceptable. Another no-show will result in you being kicked off the team without a refund. If you cannot show --for practice, a friendly, or for a match -- you had better give me as much notice as possible.

PRACTICE
Wed 12/22 at 8pm at Jackson park.

SCHEDULE
No practice on 12/26 + no friendly on 12/30.
Next practice is Wed 1/2 and next friendly is on Sunday 1/6 at 11am.
There will be Wed practice and Sunday friendly matches from 1/2 onward (the season begins 3/2)
NOW IS THE TIME TO LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU WILL BE OUT

Tyneside Journal:

A season in the heart of an amateur team

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 15

Tyneside FC 2-1 Athletes of Christ

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 14

Tyneside FC 4-0 SF Fog

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 13

Tyneside FC 2-1 SC Bosna

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 11

Ostrakizein FC 0-0 Tyneside FC

June 8, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 10

Tyneside FC 2-0 Overlords

June 1st, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 10

Tyneside FC 2-3 City

May 6th, 2008

May 4th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 9

Barbary FC 2 - 4 Tyneside FC

April 29th, 2008

May Schedule

April 27th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 8

Tyneside FC 5 - 1 Tornado

April 24th, 2008

Match 8 - Announcement

April 22nd, 2008

April 20th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 7

South City FC 1 - 0 Tyneside FC

April 18th, 2008

April 17th, 2008

Match 7 - Announcement

April 15th, 2008

April 13th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 6

Tyneside FC 0 - 1 Real Sao Paulo FC

April 6th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 5

Athletes of Christ 2 - 1 Tyneside FC

March 31st, 2008

March 30th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 4

SF Fog 1 - 2 Tyneside FC

March 16th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 3

SC Bosna 1 - 4 Tyneside FC

March 9th, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 2

Tyneside FC 4 - 0 Ostrakizein FC

March 2nd, 2008

SFSFL - 2nd Div. Match 1

Overlords 0 - 4 Tyneside FC

February 18th, 2008

End of Pre-Season

February 4th, 2008

January 21st, 2008

January 14th, 2008

December 30th, 2007

December 16th, 2007

December 16th, 2007